The MacScouter's Big Book of Skits -- T through V

Table of Contents

A Talking Martian!

Requires a lot of imagination or some props to show that these guys are horses and a Martian.

Cast: 2 Horses, Martian, perhaps some costumes
Setting: Race Track

If necessary, explain that these are two horses and a Martian.

#1: You know, I had a bad day on the track today. My rider must have eaten a lot last night, because he was a lot heavier than usual, so my back got really tired and I almost tripped.

#2: I've had similar problems. My rider hits me in the side so much with his feet that I can't run because it hurts so much.

#1: Say, did you hear that the ugly mare is going to be entered into the grooming contest? The mane on that thing just doesn't compare to either of ours.

#2: You're right. Things in the racing world just don't seem to be fair to us horses.

Martian: You know, I could help you two out with your problems.

#1 & 2: Look! A talking Martian!

Tankety Tank

This skit requires little preparation and no props, and has only two speaking parts. It can use a cast of hundreds, and it is full of blood, gore, and dead bodies. That makes it perfect for Cub Scouts and campfires.

Preparation

The Wizard and the lone Scout need to rehearse their lines, and everybody should practice a few times. The practice is as much fun as the skit. Encourage all participants to ham it up. The Wizard should wear a long bathrobe.

The Skit

A lone Scout rushes onto the stage and screams that the enemy is coming. He has no weapons to fight with! What should he do? "I know. I'll have to ask the Wizard. It's my only chance to save humanity from the terrible enemy."

The Wizard enters the stage, and the Scout rushes to him begging for help. The Wizard tells him not to panic, and hands him a secret invisible sword. The Wizard explains the sword, and tells him to say, "Stabety Stab!" when he uses it. The Wizard assures the Scout that this magic sword will protect him.

The Wizard retires to a quiet corner of the stage.

The Scout is delighted. He waves the sword around, and tells everybody about it. He boasts about what he will do with it. He moves to one end of the stage.

Several enemy soldiers sneak onto the other side of the stage, saying, "There he is" and "Let's get him." The Scout panics as they approach, worries aloud about what to do, and finally remembers to use the magic sword. Yelling "Stabety Stab!" over and over, he kills all of the enemy in a mighty battle. He is very proud of himself, and boasts of his ability.

More enemy soldiers begin to enter. The Scout starts forward, yelling "Stabety Stab!" but the enemy keeps on coming. The Scout rushes back to the Wizard for more help. The Wizard gives him an invisible gun, telling him to yell, "Bangety Bang!"

Again the Scout boasts about his weapon, goes into battle, and kills all the enemy. Again he boasts that he can defeat any enemy with the Wizard's magic weapons.

The situation is repeated, and the Scout tries "Bangety Bang!" and "Stabety Stab!" without success. This time the Wizard gives him a magic laser, for which the Scout yells, "Zapety Zap!" Again he kills all the enemy and boasts. The Wizard quietly disappears.

A single enemy soldier enters the stage. He is the biggest Scout in camp. He creeps slowly forward, as our Scout boasts about how easily he can defeat the enemy. The enemy soldier ignores the "Stabety Stab!", "Bangety Bang!", and "Zapety Zap!", as the Scout tries them several times. The Scout looks desperately for the Wizard.

The enemy moves faster across the stage. As he knocks the Scout down and runs over him, he yells, "Tankety Tank! Tankety Tank!"

Tenting

Scene: Two Cubs in a pup tent.

Cub 1: Tie up the flap. It's cold outside!
Cub 2: Oh, go to sleep and you won't feel the cold.
Cub 1: Oh please close the flap. It's so cold outside!
Cub 2: Jumps up, pulls down the flap, jumps back into sleeping bag). Now, there. Is it warmer outside?

--Thanks to Scouter Frank Dembicki, Ft. Saskatchewan, Alberta

Thar's a Bear

The object is to set up a bear warning system. One at a time set up five to eight fellows standing shoulder to shoulder. The warning system is set up by having each of them repeating the following message:

Leader: "Thar's a Bar." (correct pronunciation is important)

Bear Warner: "Whar?" (be certain that he pronounces it correct, if not correct him.)
Leader: "Over Thar." (pointing with his right hand and arm extended)
A to B: "Thar's a Bar." (at which point he will probably point, so correct him.)
B: "Whar?"
A: "Over Thar." (now he should point with the arm extended for the rest of the skit.)
B - C: "Thar's a Bar." ... and so on until the last one says it to the leader.

Go through the same procedure with the left hand. The third time have both hands extended, right leg extended, bent down. Last time the leader goes through the ritual, he pushes the guy next to him so that the rest will fall like dominoes.

There's a Bear!

A one person skit that is a good gag if done properly. One in which you should be careful at the punch line -- you don't want to injure anyone.

Cast: Nature Guide, 3-4 Victims (line them up as you get them)

Guide: I'm going to bring you through an imaginary trip to follow a bear's daily activities. First, I need a volunteer (He will be a victim). First, we'll kneel down, you in front of me. Then I'm going to say, "There's a bear!" and you're going to respond, "Where?" and I'll point him out. You still won't see him and repeat, "Where?" and I'll point him out, and then you'll say, "Ahh. I see him, he's over there!" and point the same way I did.

Guide: There's a bear!
1: Where?
Guide: Over there!
1: Where?
Guide: Over there!
1: Ahh. I see him, he's over there!

Continue by introducing the other victims, one at a time and lining them up in front of your previous victim, and repeating the same sketch, but increasing the length as you go through it in a repetitious manner ie. you point out to #1, then he to #2, then he to #3, then he to #4. Finally,

Guide: Guess what? He fell over! (Push over your victims)

The Thinker

A Scout is sitting in his tent which is a mess, everything scattered around. Several other scouts come over and ask what he is doing. The Scout replies he is thinking. The other Scouts continue asking questions and are finally told, "I am thinking about my invention." The other scouts want to help (begging and hamming it up). Finally the Scout says, "OK, but do you rally want to help?" The other scouts plead and beg. The Scout begins to instruct each Scout to pick up items and place them in the tent somewhere, (continue until everything is picked up, thereby cleaning up the tent.) When the tent is completely picked up, the Scout says: "Well that takes care of it". The other scouts, inquire, "takes care of what?". The Scout replies: "My invention, I just invented a way to get my tent cleaned."

The Thirsty Donkey

The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water! Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.

"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.

The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water! Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.

"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.

The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water! Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.

"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.

The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water! Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.

"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.

And they keep walking in circles around the campfire and repeating this (about 5 times) until someone in the audience yells, "Hey, when are you going to get to the punch line???"

The man yells back "Patience, jackass, patience!!"

-- Thanks to Bob Jenkins

The Thirsty Fisherman

Cast: 5 fisherman, and props to show a boat, water level (about two feet off floor), and a bench
Setting: Fishing on a lake

#1: I'm thirsty, but the cooler's on the beach. I guess I'll have to go get one there.

(He seems to walk on water, by walking on the bench, and comes back. #5 is interested.)

#2: I'm thirsty, but the cooler's on the beach. I guess I'll have to go get one there.

(He seems to walk on water, by walking on the bench, and comes back. #5 is confused.)

#3: I'm thirsty, but the cooler's on the beach. I guess I'll have to go get one there.

(He seems to walk on water, by walking on the bench, and comes back.)

#5: How do you do that? (Doesn't get an answer.)

#4: I'm thirsty, but the cooler's on the beach. I guess I'll have to go get one there.

(He seems to walk on water, by walking on the bench, and comes back. #5 is perplexed.)

#5: Okay. Let me try this.

(He tries to walk on water, but begins to sink into the water.)

#3: Should we have told him where the rocks are?

Three Against 1000

Three guys all bandaged up and smeared with dirt and blood come dragging into the meeting with the disbelieving tail the fantastic battle that they had just gone through. "what a battle, what fantastic odds, we never should have attempted it in the first place, 3 against a 1000, unbelievable; hamming it up. Finally, one guy says, "Yeah they were the toughest three guys I've ever seen.

Three Rivers

Players: a prospector, two tired hikers, and a "dog"

Scene: An old prospector seated around his campfire eating dinner. First tired hiker walks up to the campfire.

1st Hiker: "Hey, old timer. That grub smells mighty good; would you happen to have any extra to spare?"

Prospector: "Sure, sonny; hand me that empty plate over their and I'll fix you right up."

1st Hiker: "Gee, this plate looks kinda dirty."

Prospector: "Dirty? That plates not dirty; it's a clean as Three Rivers can get it." Prospector dishes up the food; hiker shrugs and eats.

1st Hiker: "Well, thanks for the grub. I've got to be moving on."

1st Hiker leaves and prospector continues eating. 2nd hiker walks up to the campfire.

2nd Hiker: "Boy, I've been hiking for miles and I sure am hungry. Would you have any of that great stew to share?"

Prospector: You bet; hand me that bowl over there and I'll fill it up for you."

2nd Hiker (makes face as he looks into the bowl): "This bowl seems pretty dirty to me; do have a cleaner one?"

Prospector:" Dirty? Why that bowl's as clean as Three Rivers can get it."

Prospector dishes up the food; hiker shrugs and eats.

2nd Hiker: "I've got to be going; thanks for the food."

2nd hiker leaves and prospector finishes eating.

Prospector: "Well, that was mighty good grub. Now, time to clean the dishes."

(Prospector puts dishes on the ground and whistles). "Three Rivers! Here, Three Rivers!". ("dog" comes running and starts cleaning the plates.) "Good dog, Three Rivers."

-- Thanks to Mike Keables

Three Rivers II

Scene: Two prospectors meet. First prospector has camp set up and good cooking. Dog is sitting beside him. (Boy on all fours is dog.) Second prospector comes in pulling mule named Sunshine. (Two boys covered with blanket are mule.)

Props: Pick, pan, No. 10 cans for cooking, two beat-up hats, mask for dog (if desired) and blanket for mule.

Prospector 1: Howdy!

Prospector 2: Howdy!
Prospector 1: Any luck?
Prospector 2: Nope!
Prospector 1: Come fur?
Prospector 2: Quite a job.
Prospector 1: Et lately?
Prospector 2: This mornin.
Prospector 1: Hungry?
Prospector 2: Yep.
Prospector 1: Join me?
Prospector 2: Don't mind iffen I do.
Prospector 1: Have a plate.
Prospector 2: (Holds up plate and looks at it) Don't want to seem to be pickyunish, but ain't this plate a mite dirty here in the corner?
Prospector 1: (Looks scornfully at him) Well now, it all depends on how you look at it. But I'll tell you one thing for sure. It's as clean as Three Rivers can get it.
Prospector 2: (Shakes his head looking at plate) Clean as Three Rivers can get it?
(Mule brays a loud "hee-haw")
Prospector 2: Shut your mouth, Sunshine. You heard what the man said.
(1st prospector dishes out stew and they eat.)
Prospector 2: Mighty good vittles.
Prospector 1: Thanks pardner. Mind handin' me the plates so we kin clean em up?
(2nd prospector hands him the plates)
Prospector 1: (Puts plates on floor and calls loudly over his shoulder)
Here Three Rivers. Here Three Rivers.
(Dog comes up and starts licking plates.)

Three Scoops

Basically, you get the Den or Patrol together, and they sing,

"We're three scoops of raisins,
three scoops of raisins,
We're three scoops of raisins--
In Kellogg's Raisin Bran!"

At this point, another scout comes runing out with a big wooden spoon, saying, "Yum yum, raisin bran, ohh boy, I love raisin bran," and he grabs one of the raisins and drags him off kicking and screaming. He comes back in a few seconds later, licking his spoon in a satisfied manner.

Now the raisins singe, "We're two scoops or raisins," etc.

Same thing happens again--guys grabs one of the raisins, drags him off, etc.

When you get down to the last guy, he sings, "I'm one sc--sc--oop of r-r-r-raisins," etc., "In K-K-K-ellogg's Raisin B-B-B-ran," looking around in a terrified manner.

Of course, the guy comes charging out, waving his spoon, at which point the raisin exits, singing, "Oh I wish I were an Oscar Meyer Wiener..."

Ticket Line

Fans are standing in line waiting to buy tickets for the big game, movie, or concert. Four fans are standing in line, saying how much they want to attend the event and wondering when the ticket window is going to open to sell tickets. A person walks up to the front of the line. The fans get upset telling him to not butt in line and to go to the end of the line and began to shove him back. This person tries once more to reach the front of the line and then gives up and says something to the effect; "I'm giving up, they can get someone else to open this ticket window.

Time on the Park Bench

A Scout is sitting in a bench in the park reading the newspaper, getting tired he lies down for a nap. A few minutes latter a Scout comes by, wakes him and asks for the time. The Sleeping scouts says its 6:45. The Scout goes back to sleep. Repeat this process three times, with it being thirty minutes latter each time( 7:15, 7:45, 8:15). The Scout then takes out a marker and writes on the paper, "I don't have the Time!", places it over his head and goes back to sleep. The final Scout walks up; reads the message, wakes the sleeping scout up and says: "Hey, its a quarter to nine!

Timothy Eaton

[in the USA this could be J.C. Penny or Montgomery Ward]

Number of participants: 4 or more

Props: Articles of clothing

# 2 enters and passes # 1, wearing a hat.

# 1: "Where did you get the hat ?"
# 2: "Timothy Eaton."
# 3: enters and passes # 1 carrying a pair of pants.
# 1: "Where did you get the new pants ?"
# 3: "Timothy Eaton."

Others enter carrying new articles of clothing and offer similar explanations. Finally # 4 enters wearing just underwear.

# 1: "Who do you think you are dressed like that ?"
# 4: "I'm Timothy Eaton !"

Toothache

A boy with a toothache complains to another boy. The other boy says he will help and pulls out tooth with a pair of pliers. The boy with the toothache says wrong tooth. Another person comes along and gives him some apples saying that will cure his toothache. Boy ends up with a stomachache. Another person says to tie a string to his tooth and tie the other end to a door. The door slams in the face of the boy with the toothache. He now has a toothache, headache, and a stomachache. Another person enters with some hedge clippers or a axe or something. He says, "I hear you have a toothache". The boy with the toothache says, "Not that !" and runs off the stage.

Toothpaste

In this you need two cups of water and four or more people. The people in the skit all line up in a row in front of the audience. The first person in line has water in his cup and the last person in line has an empty cup with some water hidden in his mouth.

The skit starts off with the narrator saying something about this is a demonstration of how a person can brush his teeth when there is a shortage of water. The first person takes a drink of water from his cup and proceeds to brush his teeth with his finger. After a few seconds he stops and places his head against the ear of the next person in line and that person's cheeks begin to bulge out as the first persons deflate. This person (the second person brushes his teeth with his finger for a few seconds and then puts his mouth against the next person's ear with the same results and son on down the line until the last person in line in reached. This person upon finishing brushing his teeth releases the water he has in his mouth into the cup in his hand.

Tracks

Two boys enter as if following a trail. They begin to argue over what kind of tracks they are: "I say they are raccoon tracks" "No they're wolf tracks" "No they're badger tracks ...". The argument continues until they are suddenly run over by a train. (Several boys linked together making chuga choo sounds, boy in front has a flashlight.

The Trained Caterpillar

"This is Eddy, the amazing trained caterpillar." (Three or four guys with a sheet over them, sort of like a Chinese New Year Dragon.) "Eddy, left!" (Everyone shambles left) "Eddy, right!" (Everyone shambles right.) "Eddy, sit!" (The caterpillar sits.) "Eddy, fetch!" (Throw something that can be picked up with the feet, the first guy gets it with his foot and the others stabilize him, return it.)

"OK, now for Eddy's best trick. We've been practicing this all week. We need a volunteer from the audience. Lie down, and Eddy will walk over you without harming you!" (Eddy does it, but the last guy dumps a glass of water on the volunteer.) "Oh! Sorry! Eddy's not potty-trained yet."

-- Thanks to Bob Jenkins

The Train Skit

Two boys are standing on a track arguing over what the animal that has been run over on the track is....

#1: It's a deer
#2: Nope, it's bear
#1: I'm sure it's a deer
#2: Uh-uh... look there. It's a bear...

As this goes on continuously, a group of scouts form a line, all holding on to each other's hips and form a train. They then come chugging along the track towards the guys arguing about the animal (lots of chug-chug noises here).

When they get to the two guys arguing they run them over and then, from the first two guys in the train line you hear....

Train #1: What'd ya think we hit?
Train #2: It was a deer
Train #1: But it looked like a bear...

off the stage....

-- Thanks to Dave Loseke, Cubmaster Pack 383, Beaverton, OR

The Trees

All the boys except one lined up in a row facing the audience, spaced at least Three feet apart. The remaining boy was the narrator. An adult "volunteer" Was selected; usually this was the scoutmaster. He is instructed to stand off To the side until he hears the word spring. That is his que to start running Between the trees for a few minutes.

The audience is first told the boys are trees during the summer. Their Branches are strong and sturdy, and they are full of leaves providing shade to The forest animals. While the narrator is talking, the "trees" raise their Arms and mime what the narrator is saying.

Next the audience is told about a tree in the fall and how it begins to lose Its leaves. The "trees" should begin to sag their branches.

Next the audience is told about a tree in the winter time and how the wind Howls through their bare limbs. Someone can supply the sound effects if you Desire, and the boys should be moving like their is a large gust of wind Pushing them around.

Finally, on cue as you say the word spring, have the volunteer move quickly Between the trees several times. You will finish the skit by saying "...... And Also in the springtime, notice how quickly the sap runs through the trees."

This skit can be as long or as short as you want to make it. As each season is Discussed in as great as detail as you want. The trees should be mimicking what The narrator is saying. Make sure the narrator places emphasis on the word Sap, so the audience reacts quickly to the gag.

-- From the SCOUT ASSOCIATION OF AUSTRALIA

Trick or Treat

A child comes home with a bag full of treats. The parent says that he needs to inspect the candy. Gives excuses for not giving most of it back. After the child leaves, the parent says that he must do what he has to do to protect the child and proceeds to eat some of the candy.

Trimming the Christmas Tree

Otherwise known as "Trimming the Tree" in the Leader magazine. Text from The Best of the Leader Cut Out Pages.

Cast: Mother, Father, Child, scout staff with sprig of evergreen lashed to the top; materials to make snipping and sawing sounds (you can pre-record these on cassette tape.)

Setting: Kitchen

Mother is on stage, father and child out of sight.

Father tells child to go ask mother how the tree looks.

Child runs onstage and asks.

Mother peers through imaginary kitchen window, hints and says it needs more off this side.

Child runs off stage and repeats her directions. Sounds of sawing, snipping, etc.

Repeat several times, with mother pointing in different directions each time, father perhaps becoming impatient, and child becoming more and more tired. Finally many sounds of sawing and snipping. Father marches on stage with staff, show it to mother and audience.

Father: Now is it right?!?

Turkey Contest

Four guys dressed up like turkeys waiting for the Best Turkey Contest with one turkey really strutting his stuff. Feathers can be made from construction paper and brown type clothes worn. The one turkey who is strutting his stuff, really wants to win, he preens, even leaves for a minute coming back with additional stuffing sticking out. Comments are made about this turkey by the others. The contest begins and the strutting turkey wins only to find out that the winner gets to be Thanksgiving Dinner. The turkey starts to run and the judge chases after him telling the audience how he loves a happy winner.

The Twelve Days of Christmas

Characters: Bob, 12 Cub Scout friends (if den has less than 12 boys, have them repeat their entrance on stage)

Props: Items called for in skit on a table (use your imagination to create wilder items)


Setting: Bob is standing by table with props. As each boy enters, he hands him the appropriate item.

Cub #1: On the first day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- a knob to adjust my TV. Thanks Bob.

Bob: You're welcome!

(Each cub takes items and exits. Then next cub enters from opposite side of stage)

Cub #2: On the second day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- two napkins. Thanks Bob.

Bob: You bet!

Cub #3: On the third day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- three French fries. Thanks Bob!

Bob: No problem!

Cub #4: On the fourth day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- four comic books. Thanks Bob!

Bob: Glad to do it!

Cub #5: On the fifth day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- five rusty nails. Thanks Bob!

Bob: Don't mention it!

Cub #6: On the sixth day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- six greasy rags. Thanks Bob!

Bob: OK!

Cub #7: On the seventh day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- seven soggy sweatshirts. Thanks Bob!

Bob: Yeah, you're right!

Cub #8: On the eighth day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- eight mugs for milk shakes. Thanks Bob!

Bob: Give me five! (does high five with Cub #8)

Cub #9: On the ninth day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- nine dirty dustpans. Thanks Bob!

Bob: Cool dude!

Cub #10: On the tenth day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- ten leaping lizards. Thanks Bob!

Bob: Check you later!

Cub #11: On the eleventh day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- eleven pies for pitching. Thanks Bob! ( A pie plate full of whipped cream can actually be thrown at Bob here - if you like!)

Bob: (wiping off cream) That's what friends are for!

Cub #12: On the twelfth day of Christmas my good friend gave to me -- twelve dump trucks dumping. Thanks Bob!

Bob: Bye, pal! (last cub exits, table is cleared of all props) Now, let's see. That was (singing) twelve dump trucks dumping, eleven pies for pitching, ten leaping lizards, nine dirty dustpans, eight mugs for milk shakes, seven soggy sweatshirts, six greasy rags, FIVE RUSTY NAILS, four comic books, three French fries, two napkins and a knob to adjust my TV. (looks at audience and wipes brow) Whew! I finally did it. I finally got my closet cleaned out!

Twist Mouth Family

A mother and a father had several children, now all the children had their mouths twisted out of shape except their son John, who they had sent to college and had just returned. They all got ready for bed and Mother asked Father to blow out the light. "Yes I will," was his reply. "I wish you would," said she. "Well I will," said he. Father blows upward due to the twist in his mouth. Father asks mother (use the same sequence of phrases as in the previous sentence), she blows downward. Mother asks daughter, daughter blows to the right. Mother asks son (not John) who blows to the left. Finally, John, the college son is asked. He blows straight and blows out the candle. Father then says, "What a blessed thing it is to have a son with an education."

Ugliest Man in the World (or Bad Breath)

Cast: UMITW under blanket, Circus Announcer, as many people as you want (say up to 4 or 5), victim
Setting: Circus, Boardwalk

Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen! Boys and Girls! Come and see the Ugliest Man in the World! (or Smell the Worst Breath in the World!) Ah you, Sir, would you like to try?

#1: Sure, why not! I've got a strong stomach! (looks under and faints (or says, Bad Breath!))

Continue with your other "volunteers." Each faints with, "Oh, Gross," "He's Ugleeeee!" and so on. Bring in your victim and invite him to look (or smell.) Suddenly, the UMITW faints in a similar manner to the volunteers (or says, Bad Breath!)

Ugly Baby

A lady is riding on a train with her baby wrapped in a blanket. A stranger comes and sits down next to her. He asked if he can see the baby. Upon opening the blanket the stranger says: "Ma'am, that's the ugliest baby I have ever seen." She yells at him ( you beast, how can you say such a thing, etc.) and hits him with her fist until he leaves. Repeat this three times. While beating the third stranger she yells for the conductor. She complains to the conductor that this is the third man who has "insulted my little darling". The conductor urges the stranger to a new seat. The conductor returns to apologize and tells the lady that he wants his riders to be happy. He tells the lady he will bring a her a drink and he'll stop by the kitchen and get a banana for her monkey.!

Up Harold

Mad Scientist and a monster named Harold. The mad scientist talks about his greatest creation Harold. The scientist asks for a volunteer out of the audience. The mad scientist tells Harold to rise up, walk forward, and then the monster gets near the volunteer to kill him. Harold grabs the volunteer and kills him and returns back behind the scientist. The mad scientist goes on about how great his monster is, repeating his commands for Harold to stand up, move forward and kill. What the mad scientist doesn't realize is that Harold is reacting to his commands. The mad scientist continues to gloat as Harold comes forward and kills him. Harold continues walking toward the audience as the stage blacks out.

Upside Down Singers

The singers are on stage. An announcer explains that they are going to sing upside down! They duck out of sight behind a curtain (a sheet held by two accomplices will do). Placing their hands in their shoes, they wobble the shoes above the curtain top looking as they are having trouble standing on their heads and are about to topple over while singing. They requires practice and the assistance of someone to direct them. To end the skit let one of the curtain holders become distracted and accidentally drop the curtain revealing the "upside down singers" in action."

Vampire Snack

Scene: One vampire, standing on stage, takes a can marked "blood", pours tomato juice from it into a glass and drinks it. The second vampire enters.

Vampire #1: Mmm. Delicious. Vould you like some?
Vampire #2: no, thanks. I couldn't drink another bite.
Vampire #1: So vat's new.
Vampire #2: Nothing much. I just saw a poor old bum begging on the street corner.
Vampire #1: You did. Vat did he say?
Vampire #2 He vanted me to help him. He said he hadn't had a bite in days.
Vampire #1: So what did you do?
Vampire #2: Vat else? Naturally, I bit him!

The Viper is Coming

An office setting with a boss and an assistant who runs in and tells the boss that his just received a message that the Viper is coming. The boss gets very agitated and upset repeating the assistant's message. Several others come in repeating the same message. They are all in a state of panic when the last person comes on stage with a squeegee and a sponge announcing, "I'm the vindow viper. I've come to vipe your vindows. Vhere do I start."

Version 2:

Cast: 4 Kids, The Viper, rags, pump spray

#1: (Comes running in) The viper is coming in an hour! Hide! (Runs out)
#2: (A moment later; runs in) The viper is coming in half an hour! Run! (Runs out)
#3: (A moment later; runs in) The viper is coming in 15 minutes! Call for help! (Runs out)
#4: (A moment later; runs in) The viper is coming in 5 minutes! Save yourselves! (Runs out)
Viper: (A moment later, with props) Hallo! I'm de Viper! Vere's de Vindows?


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