The MacScouter's Big Book of Skits
The style of a walk-on
is simple. A walk-on should in general be pre-arranged with the person
who is supposed to be up there talking. If it is not pre-arranged it can
be more of a practical joke. While the leader is talking, a Scout walks
on stage doing or saying something. The leader responds accordingly, usually
in an exasperated way, and the scout then says the groaner punch line.
A five second gag to put
into a loose moment.
Cast: Campfire chief
and a volunteer in the audience
Campfire Chief: And now
it's time to make a spot announcement. (Dog barks from the audience.)
Thank you Spot.
This one is a run on that
requires the above-mentioned partner whose been around for years and will
be for years more, and good timing. One of the nice things about this
one is that you can use as little as two appearances or if necessary,
you can expand upon it to other situations involving the wordplay about
"case" and court. Another line would be at the beginning where the litigant
goes to someone for advice, but they say that they don't have a case,
prompting them to go buy a briefcase.
Cast: Campfire Chief,
litigant, briefcase
Setting: Campfire
Each time the litigant
comes in, the campfire chief is about to announce or close a skit. Requires
perfect timing or a chief who is able to blend in the litigant's entries
perfectly, or both.
Chief: Hello? I'm trying
to introduce the next item? What are you doing here?
Litigant: (coming in
with briefcase) Uh, excuse me, but I need to tell you something. My
inspection results today were terrible, so I'm going to (lift up briefcase)
bring my case to court.
Next appearance, the
litigant is crawling on the ground with a flashlight, without the briefcase:
Chief: Oh, it's you again.
What are you doing down on the ground?
Litigant: I lost my case!
I'm looking for it!
Next appearance, the
litigant is up on a table, a high chair, a tall tree stump, in a tree,
whatever, carrying his briefcase. He makes noise to get attention, and
the chief shines a light on him.
Chief: What are you doing
now?
Litigator: I'm bringing
my case to a higher court!
Last appearance is a
little dangerous. Be careful to have plenty of open space where people
won't get hurt, and that the chief is ready for this.
Suddenly the briefcase
is flying through the air and the Chief catches it -- if only to protect
the audience :) -- and exclaims:
Chief: (Flustered) What's
this all about?
Litigator: My case got
thrown out of court!
Version 2:
From: Tom Oldershaw
Scene: A person standing
on a stage reciting a long story (or some other activity). A second
person will enter at various stages and interrupt him, after which the
story teller starts again.
The second person will
need the following props: A briefcase, and a step ladder.
1. Person 2 walks on
with a briefcase. First person asks him what he's doing. Reply: "I'm
taking by case to court". Walks off.
2. Enters again with
a step ladder. Same as before, this time replying: "I'm taking my case
to a higher court"
3. This time, person
two places the hands of the story teller in front of him, and puts his
case on them. "I rest my case" (This one works best when the story teller
doesn't know about it).
4. This time, without
a case: "I lost my case" [We also "lost the case" by searching all around
the stage, cabinets under the stage, near the MC ('scuse me, 'pardon
me), under his papers, etc. Then tell him you "lost your case."]
5. Entry with a banana
and case: "What are you doing with that banana?" "I am appealing my
case!"
6. Next time: Open and
close the case as you walk across the stage. When MC asks what you are
doing, tell him/her "...it's an open and shut case!"
7. Person enters, case
open and inverted. MC asks, "Now what are you doing?" Person replies,
"My case got overturned."
Scout: Walks on stage, looks
around slowly and says, "Scotty! The aliens are very unfriendly!! Quick!!
Beam me aboard!!"
Another scout in the
audience: THUNK (the sound of a 2x4 landing on stage)
1st scout, "Hey George, look
over there, smoke signals."
2nd scout ,"Oh yes Mike, what do they say?"
1st scout, pretending to look away through binoculars, says very slowly,
"Help... My... Blankets... On... Fire.
1st scout looking back at 2nd scout, "Help my blankets on fire?"
Scout 1: Whatcha doing ?
Scout 2: Writing a letter to my little brother.
Scout 1: Why are you writing so slowly?
Scout 1: Because my little brother can't read very fast!
A quickie goes like this:
Persons runs "onstage" screaming "they're after me! They're after me!"
MC asks "Who's after you" Person replies "The squirrels, they think I'm
nuts"
You need two characters,
one on stage and the other to rush on in a panic, swatting the air, looking
desperate and yelling, "It's all around me, it's all around me!"
"What? What's all around
you?" the first player asks. The other replies,
"My belt, of course!"
Player walks across the area
scattering handfuls of leaves he takes from a big bag. Another player
approaches and asks, "What are you doing?" 1st Player: I'm leaving!
-- Thanks to Brenda Beckett,
Owen Sound, Ont.
Two scouts needed, or one
scout and the MC.
One: (walks onto stage area pulling a string big enough to see)
Two:(asks) What are you doing
One: I'm pulling a string
Two: what are you doing that for?
One: Well, have you ever tried to push one?!
Two scouts needed, or one
scout and the MC.
"They're all over me, they're all over me!"
"What's all over you?"
"My clothes!"
And one more from me...
Walk across the front
of the room tossing a ball several inches to a foot up in the air.
Set up a plant in the
audience or Cubmaster asks "What are you doing?"
Replies, " I'm throwing
up!"
Through the meeting or campfire,
different people run through with some container (cups, buckets, cans,
etc). Eventually the MC stops one of them and asks what's going on to
which the reply is "your tent (car, house whatever) is on fire". Now when
we do it we add a great deal to it depending on the location setting etc.
The water carriers ham it up by making it look like a real effort or something
very serious. The MC makes some comment to the audience each time one
runs through including things like requesting a cup of coffee the next
time someone runs through. Sometimes we have people "offstage" cheering
the runner through. And sometimes we change the "punch line". Like MC:
where's the fire?, runner: there's no fire, so & so is thirsty, at
which time someone walks across with a cup and wiping their mouth saying
ahhhhhhh. I think you can get the idea from there.
-- Thanks to Hank Heine:
Alien comes in - traditional
"take me to your leader" routine etc. When taken to leader the alien says,
"Stop singing, Ging Gang Goolie -- it's our national anthem..."
-- Thanks to Karin O'Neil:
Mike: Why do you keep the
ruler on the newspaper when you're reading?
Spike: I want to get
the story straight!
Cub 1: Ask me if I'm a rabbit.
Cub 2: Okay Are you a rabbit?
Cub 1: Yes. Now ask me if I'm a beaver.
Cub 2: Are you a beaver?
Cub 1: No, stupid. I already told you I was a rabbit!
Scene 1: Guy juggling balls.
Drops one. Snaps fingers and says, "Missed!" Exits.
Scene 2: Same guy juggling
balls. Drops one. Snaps fingers and says, "Missed!" Exits.
Scene 3: Same guy says.
"If I don't get it this time, I'll shoot myself!" Juggles balls. Drops
one. Exits (Sound of gunshot)
Same guy re-appears,
snaps fingers and says, "Missed!"
Teacher: What has five fingers
and can be made of leather? Johnny : Eh... I don't know.
Teacher: One glove! Now, what has 10 fingers and can he made of leather?
Johnny : Eh.... I don't know.
Teacher: Two gloves! Now, who is the Governor General of Canada? Johnny
: Eh.... Three gloves?
Shopper: Have you any four-volt
two-watt bulbs? Clerk : For what?
Shopper: No, four-volt, two-watt.
Clerk : Two what?
Shopper: yes!
Clerk : No.
(Three tired looking hikers
enter, drop packs and flop in a circle.)
Hiker 1: (groans) What
a day.
Hiker 2: (after a pause, groans) What a day.
Hiker 3: (happily) Yeah, it sure was!
Hiker 2: (angrily) If you can't stick to the subject, I'm leaving! (First
two hikers stalk off, leaving third looking very surprised).
Center stage is a lad fishing
from a billy can or bucket, he keeps pulling the rod as though he has
something on the line. A passer by looks at him as he walks by and then
walks on, after a few steps the passer by comes back to the lad.
Passer by: "What are
you doing there then?"
Fisher: "I'm fishing, what does it look as though I'm doing?"
Passer by: "Fishing eh!, what are you fishing for."
Fisher: "I'm fishing for suckers."
Passer by: "Have you caught any?"
Fisher: "Yes you're the third today"
1st scout: "OOOOOUCH , OOOOOH
, OOOUCH."
2nd scout: "What's the matter with you?"
1st scout: "A bee's stung my thumb."
2nd scout: "Try putting some cream on it then."
1st scout: "But the bee will be miles away by this time."
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